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January 14th, 2004
GOODBYE BRENDA:
TAKING DOWN MY SHANNON DOHERTY POSTER
Yesterday
I had to do a very sad thing. I went behind my bedroom door and I took
my poster of Shannon Doherty off of the wall.
Sigh.
My poster of Shannon Doherty. It pictures her leaning up against a wall
with her arms crossed and dressed in a oversized black blazer with her
dark evil eyes, long dark hair with Bettie Page bangs and this little
smirk on her face that says: "That's right boys. It's me - Brenda
Walsh - and I'm more then you can ever handle."
Man oh man! I remember back to the day that I first bought that poster.
I was in the tenth grade - about 1991 I guess. Wow, nearly thirteen
years now. That's a long time to have a poster of a girl hanging on your
bedroom wall. Shannon was starring in FOX's sleeper hit (at the time)
the now legendary teen soap Beverly Hills 90210 playing good girl Brenda
Walsh. I first saw her picture in an issue of TV Guide and without ever
seeing an episode of the show I immediately fell in love. What was it
about her? No real secret - dark hair, dark eyes, pale skin and in that
particular picture I remember she was wearing an oversized blazer (which
was real trendy at the time) and a bulky
pair of boots (not the sleek ones I'd later acquire a fetish for, but
close enough). A few weeks later I tried to begin to follow the show if
only to gaze upon the object of my new found desire but it didn't last
long. I soon grew tired of the Beverly Hills antics of Brandon, Brenda,
Dylan and all their cool friends. Ugh. A weird eccentric kid in a fedora
and trench coat just couldn't relate. Yet, despite the banality of
Beverly Hills 90210 my adoration for Shannon continued. I remember
paying Brian Mander's kid sister two dollars for every pin up of Shannon
that she could give me out of the teeny bopper magazines that she would
buy which I could decorate my own room with.
Then came the day that I was walking through Zellers and I noticed a
bunch of Beverly Hills 90210 posters in the rack. Sure enough there was
a large poster of Shannon Doherty. Soon her poster was hung with pride
on my bedroom wall. I remember staring up at her at night and
fantasizing that Shannon and I were reenacting Burt Lancaster and
Deborah Kerr's make out scene in "From Here to Eternity" (look
- I was
a weird little kid, okay).
But that's when the criticisms started. Shannon was beginning to get a
bad name in the Hollywood scene. "Shannon is a drunken bitch who
gets into bar fights," they told me. She's just misunderstood, I
reasoned. Anybody who was discovered by Michael Landon and who was on
Little House can't be all that bad. "Jennie Garth is more
attractive," they would tell me. Bah! What did they know? Give me
Shannon's dark evil raven looks to any California princess any day, I
thought. "Her eyes are uneven," people would go so far to
point out. Are they? I couldn't tell but the angle that her head was
turned on the poster made it hard to really figure it out.
So there Shannon hung on my wall for a good long time. After a while she
hung in my closet, and when I finally grew older, moved out of my
mothers house and into my own apartment she hung behind the bedroom door
where on ly
the privileged would gaze on her. Although her career went up and down -
getting fired from 90210, getting hired on Charmed, getting fired from
Charmed, the Playboy spread, the bar fights and divorce and tabloids and
bad press and getting fat and old and dumpy looking and haggard like if
the drugs, liquor and partying had taken their toll - I never really
stopped loving the fresh faced picture of Brenda Walsh hanging on my
bedroom wall. It reminded me of what she was to me. Shannon Doherty was
my poster girl. My pin up queen. Can't say I was ever much of a fan of
anything she ever did but when I was sixteen years old there wasn't a
more desirable woman in the world to me.
But, alas, there comes a time when you need to grow up and put childish
things away. So I carefully took down my now brittle and crumbling
poster of Shannon, took one last look at that smirk and those eyes, and
began to roll her up carefully into a tube and I put the elastic around
to hold her in place for another day.
Goodbye Brenda. It's been nice. Hope you find your paradise.
I sighed, and then I hung up a poster of the Black Canary in its place.
Okay. Maybe I'm not ready to grow up just yet. :)
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